Negotiate Like A Pro: 11 Tips
 By Terry M. Blair

Volumes have been written about conducting business negotiations, and if you’re too lazy to read, high-paid consultants will advise you.

Save yourself a lot of reading and expense by adopting these basic tips instead.

Your first step for all negotiations is to decide on one of two approaches: either win-lose or win-win. That’s a choice between playing hardball or seeking mutually beneficial outcomes.

In the win-win approach, you and the one you negotiate with each gain something, but probably not as much as either of you originally wanted, in order for the other to gain as well. In the win-lose approach, you might gain more, and the other fellow considerably less, but you also run a greater risk of gaining nothing.

Whether you go all out or are conciliatory, the following tips work with either the win-lose or the win-win approach.

1. Know what you want. Before beginning, make a list of what you intend to achieve. Divide that list into goals that you must achieve and those for which you’re willing to settle for less. You must know what you’re willing to give up and what is indispensable before you can wheel and deal effectively.

2. Prepare. Know what’s necessary to achieve your goal. Don’t be surprised in mid-negotiation by the other side pointing out a cost or a preliminary task you had not anticipated that’s necessary for achieving your goal. Such surprises change the calculus. Unanticipated costs force you to adjust midstream, which can adversely affect your negotiating position.

3. Speak plainly. Negotiations are tough enough when both sides understand each other. Don’t add difficulty by resorting to jargon.

4. Agree. Mutually determine what you and the other side can agree upon, so you don’t waste time negotiating unnecessary factors. More importantly, if you skip this step, you might find yourself unnecessarily dealing away something in order to gain something else that could have been obtained without making concessions.

5. Identify limits. What is it you desire that the other side won’t give up, and vice versa? These differences frame your negotiation. By establishing limits to the negotiation, both sides will recognize immediately if the other introduces extraneous, diverting issues or suddenly increases its demand. Fairly framing the issues should give each side respect for the other and confidence to deal in good faith.

6. Switch sides. Once the issues have been defined and the limits drawn, each side should rephrase the other’s position in their own words to see if they accurately understand what each other has in mind. This helps identify misconceptions and erroneous assumptions. Never assume you know what the other side desires, even if it seems clear. Repeat it back to them for verification.

7. Listen. As negotiations proceed, spend more time listening than speaking. Sometimes just letting the other side talk through its own position clarifies what’s really important to them, and even can identify minor points blown out of proportion. The same is true for you, too.

8. Be patient. With much to achieve and many points on which to reach agreement, haste is never advisable. Vital details can be lost or glossed over, only to surface after the fact when they will leave a sour taste.

9. Be calm, but be alert to emotions. If all human endeavors were purely rational, negotiations would be easier. Alas, we all bring emotional issues to the table. If you’re excitable, you’re unlikely to recognize when the other side lapses into an emotion-based demand. Be prepared to identify your and your negotiating partner’s emotions and to recognize when reason has given way to sentiment or passion. This isn’t to say emotions have no place in negotiations, but they need to be recognized for what they are because they demand a different kind of response.

10. Be professional. Separate the person from the person’s interest.

11. Hide your flinches. We don’t advocate deception. But there’s no need to telegraph your punches or reveal your innermost angst. Such emotional expressions can result in the other side wrongly focusing on your perceived weaknesses, rather than on the issues you framed at the onset.

(Posted May 2006)

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